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Why So Many Male Feminists? A Possible Answer (Our Stories)

Male feminists are something of a mystery to a lot of the Men’s Right’s movement. Often they seem to be among the most angrily opposed to Men’s Rights, and theories about them abound. It’s possible we may finally have a proper answer.
The following article was originally posted on our friendly neighbourhood Men’s Rights reddit.


 

Why So Many Male Feminists?

 
 
I hear the question asked frequently: why do so many men support a movement that demonizes them?
It’s not a question with an easy answer. I hear it dismissed too often as “desperate men trying to get laid” or predators using the feminist movement as cover. While it’s true in some cases, they are far from the majority. At one time, I was one of them, even if I didn’t officially identify as one. I’m just going to speak from my experience, so it doesn’t necessarily represent every individual.


   

Feminism Is Everywhere

 

For a long time, I never had any reason to question what I was taught. In school, we were sent the message of male abusers, female victims. Male victims were never even given lip service, let alone seen as a real problem. Girls were taught to avoid toxic relationships with nothing similar for men. I was bombarded with this message from school, the media, everywhere I went. It’s pretty easy to believe when it’s one-sided and I wouldn’t doubt many male feminists have only heard one side.

A more selfish reason is simply because it makes them feel powerful. It makes them feel useful. You’re on the side of justice. You’re protecting vulnerable women from evil men. We all fantasize about being the hero sometimes and being a feminist is an easy way to do that.
I react instinctively to female pain more than I do to male issues. It’s not a conscious reflex, even. Judgment is almost immediate, at least until I remind myself there are two sides to every story. I know better and female issues resonate with me more than male ones. It takes conscious thought to reign it in. They see injustices that women have to go through, how miserable it can make them, but have an enormously difficult time seeing the other side.


 

Surrounded By Feminists – With No Male Victims In Sight

   

That’s not including the fact that I have had female friends and even relatives hurt by men: those who have been abused and even raped. It makes me furious whenever I think about it, and there are a couple people… I hope one day to open the newspaper and discover that they’ve been found dead face down in a ditch. It would be easy for me to be a feminist, very easy. I’ve read articles and Quora responses from male feminists, and just about all of them have seen female friends and relatives hurt by cruel men.

One we can’t overlook is having either a partner or mother be a passionate feminist. I’ve seen a couple articles with titles like: “How I went from MRA to feminist” and it generally seems to be falling in love with a feminist partner. And if you’re raised to believe something along with having little reason to question it, being a male feminist is only natural. And hearing the suffering they’ve endured only makes it easier.


 

The Hidden Vulnerability of Men

 

By all rights, I should be one myself. I’m not a particularly masculine individual. I have high emotional sensitivity and occasionally suffer from anxiety. My personality is more what you would expect from a feminist man, yet I’m not one.

In the interest of complete honesty, if it wasn’t for being on the Autism Spectrum, I would probably be one. However, it leaves me quite vulnerable to false and wrongful accusations, something I learned the hard way. Being different means that I’m seen as dangerous, particularly by women. I’ve been on the receiving end of harassment allegations multiple times and even when I wasn’t formally punished, my reputation was destroyed. No one believed it was a misunderstanding. It’s made me quite paranoid about asking anyone out.


 

The Male Tendency Towards Female Supremacy

 

And I once thought and openly stated that women were superior. I considered women to be kinder, gentler, more loving, more supportive. I never went as far as the article: “Dear men, this is why women have every right to be disgusted with us” but that was my general sentiment.

I was also and still am uncomfortable with “locker room talk”. I learned over time that women can be just as bad, sometimes worse, but it’s still not something I’m fond of. I have those feelings and desires, certainly; I just prefer to keep them to myself.

Even if it is perplexing, there are genuine reasons for males to be feminists beyond trying to get laid. Many of them were raised by feminist mothers and often single mothers. My own mom is a feminist, though thankfully not a crazy one.


 

What Are Your Thoughts? (Men Are Human)

 
Judging by the number of prominent feminist men taken down by sexual assault allegations, there do seem predatory men in the movement. However, looking at the majority of feminist men, our commentator’s views aligns very strongly with what we have seen time and time again. The part about him having reduced empathy for men, in particular, is something we have shown before is a problem for men in general
Are you inclined to agree – or not? Do you have a similar experience? Let us know in the comments.
 
Photo used under terms of Fair Use.

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